"Remember when I found you there - alone in your electric chair?"

Just a quick update on us (totally unrelated song, by the way). On Jan. 1st, H, the birthmom, had her baby. She subsequently decided to parent him. That's the long and the very short of it. We're dealing, of course. It is nice to have the whole thing resolved and we will not give up hope that a baby is out there for us. It's difficult to think of going through the entire "waiting" process again - if another woman picks us and we end up here again. But everyone keeps saying that everything happens for a reason. I believe that there is a really important reason. A young friend of ours (15) said, "I guess God knows that there is a baby out there who needs you more." We can't wait for that baby - we need him or her (or him AND her) too.

All else is good here. Buck and RKZ are currently both using the bathroom. I told Buck, "There are a lot of people poopin' in our house right now." Buck replied, "AND a lot of people stinking!"

Epilepsy - smepilepsey.

"It's been one week"

Buck and RKZ in the backyard - this is yesterday, so obviously Buck is no worse for wear.

A wrap-up on us: Buck got in to see a neurologist yesterday (12/31/08). After a 3rd, unexplained seizure, they formally diagnose a person with "seizure disorder" aka "epilepsy." It sounds way more dramatic than it is. About 1/10th of the population has it - many more people have one seizure in their lifetime. Buck is otherwise (brain, blood, etc) totally healthy and this, added to his young age (3), is a very good sign that he will probably grow out of having seizures. For at least a year, Buck will be on seizure suppressing medication called Clobazam. It's in the valium family of drugs, but it has very little side effects for most children (ie: he won't turn into a zombie taking it which was our fear). He took his first dose last night (5mg a 1/2 dose) and it made him a bit sleepy (it was bed-time) but he was still a crazy freak-show 3 year old like normal. If our boy takes the medication and does not have another seizure (our nurse case-worker works with us in this) then he will be taken off the medications in a year. The best part (for me) is that he probably shouldn't play video games even when he's older - he'll hate that but I think it's actually a bonus. There is an 86% chance (funny stat - but there it is) that he will have another seizure before he begins taking the full dose of medication (in 6 days) - but we're hoping to have him so well rested that it doesn't happen. I do have to say that the worst part of this all is seemingly sitting around waiting for Buck to drop.

Still no baby news...see how the waiting goes?

Oh yeah - HAPPY NEW YEAR!